One indicator of spiritual/emotional maturity is that more satisfaction results from understanding than from being understood. It is enlightening to discover that admiration of features (appearance, gifts, talents or performance) merely indicates an acknowledgment and appreciation of them, not a love for that person.
Facets are the authentic expression of one’s person (humor, empathy, loyalty, and temperament).
It becomes apparent that when one loves or is loved dearly and deeply, features are less critical than facets.
Features display performance, while facets, favorable or flawed, convey authentic character. Features may attract your attention to that person, but facets should be the basis for the relationship.